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The Kids Who Call the Streets Home

Every day at Enlighten, we see the amazing potential that all young people have. So it breaks my heart when I think about the tens of thousands of girls and boys in Australia who don’t get the same chances to shine as most kids, because they’re trying to work out where they’re going to sleep tonight and where their next meal is coming from.

Depending on where you live, youth homelessness might not be all that visible a problem. But in fact, more than 36,000 people aged 12 to 25 are homeless, half of the young people seeking shelter are turned away because there aren’t enough services, and in Sydney more than 1,000 young people will be sleeping on the streets tonight.

Ella, a young woman I met through my work with Enlighten whom I admire, volunteers regularly to help homeless young people. She has written a story about her experiences one recent winter night on the streets of Sydney. I love Ella’s authentic, compassionate voice, so I wanted to share her story with you. And below, you’ll find links to some charities who are doing amazing work to help disadvantaged young people.

 

We were here to find the kids who call the streets home. The kids who sleep on cardboard boxes, subtly wedged behind the impressive sandstone structures of Central Station. The kids who might get a grant from Public Housing to rent a hotel room for the night and then cram 5, 6, 7, 8, sometimes more, kids onto the floor of one hotel room so they can stay warm and get high together.

It was cold. So cold that the chill made my nose piercing hurt. So cold I couldn’t feel the tips of my fingers or toes, despite wearing gloves. So cold that going from outside to inside the car, my glasses fogged up so much that I couldn’t see. We couldn’t find many kids. This made me so glad. There were a few we knew, hovering at the food vans for bread and hot tea. But they were mainly older. Not the 14-, 15-, 16-year-olds and others we usually see during the warmer months.

We went to see a few kids who’d called the coordinator during the day. “Do you need anything?” he’d asked and the answer was, without fail, a resounding yes. Things we, from privilege—and yes, we are privileged if we have a roof over our heads, food in the cupboard, blankets on our bed and electricity—shamefully take for granted. One girl requested “candles, food and blankets, please”. It was only the last word which astounded me. Despite coming from a home life most of us could not imagine, despite needing candles because where she was staying did not have electricity—which sends shivers up my spine as it is less than five minutes from my own home—she still managed to tack “please” onto the end of a sentence and be polite during our entire interaction. This girl I’d met before, during the warmer months, when she’d managed to find a place in a refuge. Her accommodation is so unstable that her suitcase lives in the coordinator’s car and he goes to meet her when she needs things.

“I met you a few months ago,” I told her.

She looked at me. “Sorry. I get high a lot. I don’t remember.” Then she turned back to the car and rifled through her suitcase to find her missing shoe.

Another girl, who again gave my naivety an electric shock, called us asking for food. She was not sleeping on the streets this winter. She was not in a refuge. She was not even bunked down with her street family in a hotel room or couch surfing with her friends. Oh no. She was staying with her parents for a little while. Parents so wrapped up in their own addiction issues that they were not providing food to their own child. Her home life was so unstable that this little one was forced to call us to ensure she’d get a meal. Sitting in the car outside her parents’ home, my heart just broke a little more.

We visited one of the major refuges for young people, which belongs to the agency I volunteer with. It is far from a hotel. With cracked walls and mismatching furniture, it’s a last resort for kids who would alternatively be on the streets or in jail. We pilfered some food and sheets (with permission, to give to kids who need them) and said hi to a few of the kids we knew—kids who were fortunate enough to have got a bed. But they are kids who bounce from the streets to friends’ houses to refuges—where they might get kicked out, or their time there expires, or they might chose to leave—and go back to the streets, to friends’ houses, to refuges. And it makes me wonder how we ever break this poverty cycle.

These kids are just like any other normal kids. Except they use drugs. And drink. And live out of a suitcase if they’re lucky. And they don’t have the support of a community because of The Stereotype. The Drop-Kick, Drop-Out, Dead-Beat, Useless, Worthless-Homeless-Culture Stereotype that we as a me-me-me culture impose on these kids. It’s a we-don’t-want-our-kids-to-associate-with-people-like-that, no-you-don’t-deserve-a-chance-because-of-where-you-come-from culture that makes the public housing towers of Waterloo exactly what they are. It makes it incredibly difficult for these kids to break out of the poverty cycle when they live in ghettos like that. It means these kids aren’t only up against adverse family situations, a low socio-economic status, difficulty obtaining work and education (it’s hard to do that when you don’t know where you’re going to be sleeping, aye), addiction and mental illness and lack of access to quality care. It means they’re also up against us, not giving them a chance.

And this means so much to me. It’s personal. And it makes me so angry. We have so much, we’re “the lucky country”—yet children, CHILDREN, are not afforded opportunity simply because of circumstances often out of their control. And most people won’t see the big hearts of these kids. Most people won’t know that my friend who is a youth worker got an SMS from one of her kids telling her she was an “angel” who was benefiting his life. Most people don’t see the appreciation of these kids when we give them a tin of soup and a donated bread loaf. Most people don’t understand what a big thing completing year 10 at school is for some of these kids.

I have written about this before, and I imagine I will continue to do so. While you’re warm in your bed, sitting in your heated office, taking a warm shower, cooking for the family, flipping through your textbooks for your degree, hanging off the fridge because you feel like something but there’s just too much choice, I’d encourage you to remember that there are young people in our own country who are not afforded these luxuries. Perhaps you’ve the money to donate to one of these charities which does so much work. Perhaps you’ve not the money, but the time to volunteer in a food van for a few hours once a fortnight. Perhaps you just want to understand a little more about this aspect of Australia we don’t talk about. All I hope I can do is encourage you to think as you’re walking down the street. And to look. And not judge. Maybe all is not as it seems.

This is an edited excerpt of a longer story, which you can read in full at Ella’s blog. For a list of agencies and helplines that support homeless young people across Australia, go here. For New Zealand, try here.

In Sydney, several charities do great work to help homeless and disadvantaged young people and they all rely on volunteers like Ella, as well as donations.

I applaud the philosophy of Father Chris Riley’s Youth Off the Streets: “We believe that in order to break the cycle of disadvantage, abuse and neglect, all young people need to be provided with the opportunity to achieve their full potential.”

The Salvation Army’s Oasis Youth Support Network offers education, training, jobs, counselling, drug and alcohol programs, food and accommodation.

Reverend Bill Crews’s Exodus Foundation provides food, showers, clean clothes, financial assistance, counselling and literacy programs.

 

(Heart image by Plismo, Creative Commons 3.0 license.)

Taking the Blues out of Puberty, Part 3: For Schools

In the last of our three-part series on supporting girls through puberty, Enlighten Education’s sexuality education expert Rachel Hansen this week looks at what schools can do to help. But first, I have some exciting news about a new sexuality education initiative from Enlighten Education.

good talks title2Schools frequently request sexuality education programs from us, and we have listened to you! We are delighted to announce that from 2012 our talented presenters will also be offering the Good Talks sexuality education programs developed by our New Zealand program manager, Rachel Hansen.

Good Talks provides holistic sexuality education programs for girls and boys that focus on empowering them to cherish their individuality and build positive relationships based on respect, equality and healthy choices. Programs are tailored to each individual school’s needs, with an emphasis on ensuring that the material is age appropriate. Topics covered can include puberty, anatomy, conception, pregnancy, contraception and an examination of the way sexuality is represented in the media and popular culture. For more information or to book a half-day Good Talks seminar at your school, email us at enquiries@enlighteneducation.com.

And now, over to Rachel . . .

 

Last week I offered some tips to support parents in talking to their girls about puberty and getting their first period, because now more than ever, parents need to have the knowledge and confidence to be able to discuss sexuality with their children. The work of parents also needs to be backed up by quality holistic sexuality education within all our schools.

If, like many parents, you assume that your child is already getting basic sexuality education at school, think again. Despite the fact that more than half of Australian teenagers are sexually active by the time they are 16, there is no mandatory, comprehensive Australia-wide sex-education policy. In New Zealand, sexuality education is a key area of learning in the National Curriculum, which means that it must be taught at primary- and secondary-school levels. Yet a 2007 enquiry by the New Zealand Education Review Office concluded: “The majority of school sexuality education programmes are not meeting students’ learning needs.” In both countries, there are some schools that offer fantastic programs, but there is no guarantee that your child will be one of the lucky ones.

Many parents say to me, “Oh, but my child has no interest/no idea/no awareness about anything to do with sexuality.” This may be true, but their classmates do, and their classmates are talking. If a child isn’t getting information from her family or her school, she will turn to her friends or the internet. I don’t have to persuade you that googling “vagina” is probably not going to throw up much useful advice for a 10-year-old. So I urge schools across Australia and New Zealand to do everything they can to meet the physical and emotional needs of students as they reach puberty.

Make it age appropriate.
As I discussed in an earlier post, puberty is starting earlier for girls, and it is important that they understand what is happening to them before they get their first period. This means that schools need to rethink the age at which they teach students about puberty. In New Zealand for at least the past 40 years, students have been taught about puberty usually in years 7 and 8. As it is not uncommon for girls to start menstruating at age 9 or 10 now, I encourage schools to teach it in years 5 and 6.

Don’t exclude the boys!
Ensure that the boys in your school are equally well informed about female puberty as the girls, and vice versa. The boys need to be in on the period talks, and the girls need to understand erections and breaking voices. If girls and boys understand what the other is experiencing and why the changes happen, bullying is likely to be greatly reduced.

When we had the puberty talk at school, the boys and the girls were separated. I never knew what the boys learnt, but afterwards they were fascinated with our ‘pad packs’ that we’d been given, and they stole them and teased us, demanding to know what we had been told. We were all really embarrassed and didn’t know what to say to the boys. I thought that it would be really naughty if we told them – because obviously our teacher didn’t want them knowing. Because they weren’t taught about it, it made it seem like periods were taboo and secret from boys. — Kelly

School was tough. The boys used to grope us to see if we were wearing a pad, then announce to the entire corridor that we had our periods. Or they’d go into your locker looking for pads to steal and stick all over the corridor. — Sophie

Stock your library with books and pamphlets on puberty.
Age-appropriate books and take-away pamphlets are fantastic for students to access in their own time and when they need answers. Primary schools can be reluctant to put sexuality and puberty books in the library for fear that parents of younger students will complain. One solution that I have seen in some schools is to have a special part of the library dedicated to the older students. These students like it because it’s their special place, and it’s somewhere they can go for answers if they don’t feel comfortable asking their teachers or parents.

Make sure girls know where to go for help and advice.
Girls need to know who to go to for support at school if they have concerns or questions about puberty or sexuality. Make sure that girls also know where a supply of pads are kept in case they are caught out. Many schools have these at the administration office, which is always staffed during the day. It is worth having a brief discussion with staff at the start of the year about what to do when a girl gets her period and needs support, as some staff will be unaware of the stress that periods cause some girls.

I got my period for the first time in my first week of high school. I was mortified because I didn’t have a pad. My friend went and asked the lady at the front desk and she gave me one – thank goodness! I am not sure what I would have done otherwise. — Laura

There was always the fear of getting caught at the far end of school from my locker, needing to change pads and having, in the time a teacher thought was acceptable for a loo stop, to run from one end of the school to another to get supplies. — Sophie

Also be sure that girls can dispose of used pads and tampons appropriately. As the average age at which girls get their first period decreases, primary schools now need to make sure there are sanitary bins in the girls’ toilets.

Rachel Hansen headshotRachel Hansen is the progam manager for Enlighten Education in New Zealand and is an experienced educator who has a first-class honours degree in Psychology and a Masters degree in Criminology from Cambridge University (UK). Rachel is the founder of Good Talks, an organisation that offers sexuality education to schools and parents.

Asquith Girls High: Looking at the Big Picture

At Enlighten, we know that girls flourish and shine after our workshops, because we’ve seen it with our own eyes (and felt it in their big warm hugs!). But our work does so much more than give girls a self-esteem and confidence boost on the day. We aim to be part of a wider and ongoing culture change for the girls we work with, at school and beyond.

We encourage schools to maximise the benefit of our work by using it as part of a big-picture approach, and this week I’d like to share with you what I think is one of the best examples of a school doing just that. Jane Ferris, the principal of Asquith Girls High School, a public school in Sydney, last year attended a national conference in Melbourne that I was a keynote speaker at, “Insights: A Fresh Look at Girls’ Education”. In an unusual and forward-thinking move, she had brought along three of the school’s staff, too. They were inspired and felt that Enlighten’s message was what they needed, as part of the school’s broader program of improving outcomes for girls. Jane said:

When you have 900 young women attending an all girls’ school, it is a great opportunity to focus on issues confronting young women today. Since girls now outperform boys in external exams such as the HSC, it is too easy to consider that all the battles have been won and we no longer need to worry about issues in girls’ education. However, something is still holding young women back in our society as they are under-represented in business, our legal system and politics – what a waste of so much talent! Also, sadly, women as a group have too many experiences of abuse and violence. Therefore as a school we need to support young women to have a positive outlook, believe in themselves and ‘have a go’ in all that they strive to achieve.

From the outset, Jane saw that the greatest value would come from involving the whole school, so she organised her own one-day staff training conference for the teachers. I spoke, along with a number of other experts in teen girls’ issues. Then I came back to present to the girls, and something I have never experienced before happened: Jane released the entire welfare team for the day so they could come and watch me in action with the girls. This turned out to be incredibly valuable, because it meant that once I left, the staff had a deep understanding of what the girls had learned and experienced. They could speak the same language with the girls as I had, thus giving ongoing life to the work we’d done that day. The staff were empowered to be part of the culture change.

Jane notes that since starting their work on girls’ issues, the school’s “staff are more aware and taking things on board . . . At the nucleus is a gender team of staff and executive that have led a girls’ education conference and follow-up in all faculties.” They use every opportunity in the curriculum to promote the theme, Jane notes:

As Danni says, the most common glass ceiling holding girls back is the mirror they look in. Therefore this has proved a very positive starting point for our students, to think about themselves more positively. We want to follow through on this and get them to realise the pressures they are under as consumers. Through English and Commerce we want them to learn to deconstruct advertising and identify how they are being targeted in ways that not only ensure they buy more, but at the price of feeling they are not good enough. Through the curriculum we also want to make sure they learn about positive female role models.

Judging by the girls’ passionate and positive feedback, they were powerfully moved by the workshops I led. I am truly touched that one of the girls, Bec Torrington, in Year 9, has even nominated me for a Pride of Australia award in the Inspiration category. But kudos to Jane for seeing that there is wider, ongoing work to be done:

Danni is a highly motivational speaker and clearly has had a positive impact on the way our students feel. However, there are no quick fixes or magic wands. As a school we have to continue to promote a message of positive outlooks and friendships amongst our students.
In planning one always need to look at the big-picture rather than isolated programs or initiatives. Our approach is one of developing the whole young woman with a breadth of learning opportunities and extra curricular activities – to empower her with the experiences and skills to succeed in the world outside of school.

"Enlightened" girls completing the 21 day challenge.
"Enlightened" girls completing the 21 day challenge.

In light of Jane’s point about school staff working together to maintain a positive culture for girls, I’ve put together some discussion starters that schools might like to consider at their next staff meetings or staff development programs. These are based on previous blog posts, which can act as an impetus for discussion. Staff could split into groups, each considering one of these discussion starters, then report back to the whole staff:

Keeping Feminism Relevant
Rather than just fretting about and lamenting the plight of teen girls, at Enlighten we offer a viable alternative: feminism! This week a commentator in the UK made this excellent point, which I feel sums us up: “Feminists can make cause with traditionalists in wanting to limit some of the more extreme effects of an exploitative culture . . . But let’s be clear. We can only help [girls] if we have a good alternative to offer: the role models, the interesting jobs and the alternative ways of enjoying life that make a padded bra and a bit of rude dancing on the telly not shocking – just rather dull.” Yes!

About feminism:
International Women’s Day: Keeping Feminism Relevant
Putting Girls’ Issues Back on the Radar

Discussion starter:
– How are you connecting the young women at your school to the women’s movement?

Raising Girls Who Have the Courage to Be Imperfect

About embracing imperfection:
The Courage to Be Imperfect

Discussion starters:
– What signs are there that girls are numbing the feeling that they aren’t good enough?
– What steps can we start taking today to make the girls in our lives feel confident that they are loved and worthy?

Beyond Mean Girls

About bullying:
Bullying: It’s Time to Focus on Solutions

Discussion starters:
– In what ways does your school celebrate differences?
– What resources does your school currently access to assist in creating a safe environment for all students?
– How could these initiatives be enhanced?

Cyber Gals

About girls and information and communications technologies:
Real-World Tech Influencers

Discussion starters:
– How are the young women at your school encouraged to do creative, inspiring things using technology?
– Who are the female tech-influencers within your school who your girls can use as role models?

Girls and Eating

About girls and eating disorders:
Like Mother, Like Daughter
Eating Disorders and Primary School Children

Discussion starters:
– How can your school encourage girls to make healthy choices without shaming them?
– How might the relationship girls have with food affect their academic performance?

Be aware of your dreams . . . they just might come true!

A couple of weeks ago I talked about research that proves that gender stereotypes are alive and well in Hollywood. Now a friend has sent me the perfect antidote: “Plastic”, a beautiful, clever short film written and directed by an award-winning young Australian woman, Sandy Widyanata.

As the film begins, we see Anna nervously preparing for a first date with Henry, a man she has secretly loved for years. She has nothing to wear, there’s a huge pimple on her nose and she feels fat. If only she could change a few things and look a bit more like those girls in beauty magazines . . .

Anna discovers that she can do the impossible and can sculpt her body to look just the way she wants. Would you do the same if you could? And how far is too far?

I don’t want to give too much away — it really is worth spending the 6 or so minutes to see how the story unfolds. The film is a great discussion starter for teen girls. It raises interesting questions about what real beauty is, what we really need in order to be happy and what it means to be true to yourself. And best of all, it is also simply a great film, so girls are just entranced. Enjoy the film, and then take a look at the suggested lesson plan activities below.

Plastic – Short Film from Plastic the Film on Vimeo.

Classroom Activities
A big thank you to Kellie Mackerath, who told me about this film. Kellie used to be a teacher and an Enlighten presenter, and now works full-time at NIDA and directs theatre. She has these great suggestions for classroom activities after screening “Plastic”:

— The film opens with an image of a moth. Like a butterfly, a moth can symbolise transformation. As you watch the film again, plot the journey of the moth. How does its journey relate to Anna’s story?

— What are the images that Anna surrounds herself with in her flat? These images assist Anna to make some important decisions in the film. Which images encourage her to make positive decisions? Do an audit of your environment (including your bedroom, the places you study and your virtual spaces). What images/messages are you surrounding yourself with? In the classroom, create a wall of images and messages that inspire you.

— The magazine in Anna’s bathroom is called Real Beauty. In your own words, define what you believe “real beauty” is. As a group, create your own “Real Beauty” magazine.

Thanks also to Sharon Witt, author of the Teen Talk books,
for these valuable discussion starters:

— If you had the power to mould your body into the ideal you believe in, what parts would you change and why?

— Do you think changing these parts of your body would make you any happier?

— Towards the end of the film, when the moth lands on the side table next to the photograph of Anna, did you feel she was more beautiful in the photograph? Why?

Bullying: It’s time to focus on solutions

Australia made a step in the right direction last week with the first-ever National Day of Action Against Bullying and Violence. Kerri-anne Kennerly took a huge personal interest in the cause and pushed to discuss bullying at length on her show.

I went along with my beautiful, brave and articulate 16-year-old step-daughter, Jazmine, who spoke about her experiences of being bullied, as did another teen, James. Tess Nelson spoke for her son, Dakota.

Kudos must go to Kerri-anne for extending the story to more than 9 minutes, which for breakfast TV is a double segment. The piece raised awareness of the seriousness of bullying and it gave voice to the experiences of the victims of bullying, which I think is very important.

But ever since the segment finished, I have been bursting to take the discussion further. In this post, I want to go beyond the “what, where and why” and discuss the issue that will really make a difference to kids’ lives: how to stop bullying.

What schools can do

We all need a whole-school culture that makes it clear bullying will not be tolerated. Steps that I have seen work in schools include:

  • strong peer-support programs, where older children buddy up with younger ones and look out for them
  • a zero-tolerance approach to any bullying incident
  • celebrations of difference, such as school multicultural days, gender awareness programs, anti-homophobia initiatives
  • getting the local police youth liaison officer in to discuss the topic with students, which the police are more than happy to do.

Bystanders, take a stand

I think the National Day of Action organisers got it right when they chose to focus this year on encouraging bystanders to do more to stop bullying. Let’s consider the video that recently did the rounds on YouTube of a NSW teen boy throwing another boy to the ground in retaliation for bullying. The teen had been subjected to bullying for years and tried to turn the other cheek—until on this day, in his own words, he “snapped”.

I was disturbed that many in the media portrayed the bullied boy as a hero for fighting back. A Current Affair noted that he had “finally stood up for himself”, as though up until then he’d been somehow morally weak and that the only true way to stand up for yourself is to use physical force.

I empathise with the boy who had been bullied, victimised and assaulted repeatedly before retaliating. But I think if we want to use the word “hero”, we should look at the girl at the end of the video. After the assaults, a friend of the bully comes forward to retaliate against the assault on the bully. The girl walks over and stands between them and assertively tells the bully’s friend to back off.

One of the things that alarmed me in that video was the number of bystanders doing nothing or, worse still, filming the violence. The standard we walk past is the standard we set. That girl was amazing. The fact that she came forward to stop the violence in a nonviolent way is to be celebrated—and encouraged in all schools.

Teachers are of course responsible for doing everything they can to stop bullying—but the reality is that in 85% of cases, bullying takes place when there are no adults around. That’s why it is so important to create a school culture in which bullying is not tolerated and bystanders are encouraged to step up and say “It’s not on!”

Get real about bullying

Even today there are still some people who think bullying is just harmless name calling. Bullying takes numerous serious forms:

  • verbal—name calling, teasing, verbal abuse, humiliation, sarcasm, insults, threats
  • physical—punching, kicking, scratching, tripping, spitting
  • social—ignoring, excluding, alienating, making inappropriate gestures
  • psychological—spreading rumours, glaring, hiding or damaging possessions, malicious texts, email messages or Facebook comments, inappropriate use of camera phones.

All are very damaging.

Know the signs

I interviewed the Police Youth Liaison Officer at Castle Hill in Sydney, Senior Constable Rob Patterson, to find out more about bullying. He told me that his number one piece of advice to kids who are being bullied is: “Tell someone, and if they don’t listen, tell someone else.”

That this advice is even necessary highlights the sad fact that few children who are being bullied actually tell an adult about it. In fact, the father of the boy in the video who retaliated against bullying told A Current Affair: “I didn’t realise how much trouble he was actually in until I’d seen that video . . . you poor little bloke, how many years did you put up with this sort of treatment?”

That means it’s important for teachers and parents to be aware of the signs, such as:

  • refusing to go to school
  • a drop in academic performance
  • changes in appetite or sleeping patterns
  • bruises, scratches and other injuries
  • changes in personality, e.g., becoming withdrawn or angry.

Call bullying what it really is

Senior Constable Patterson noted that the police and legal system tend not to use the term “bullying”, because it softens people’s perception of offences that may be very serious. The police call bullies’ offences what they really are, using terms such as “assault”, “intimidation” and “online harassment”. If we also begin using the correct terms for these offences, we will begin to acknowledge the serious impacts that bullying has on victims and send a clearer signal to bullies that their actions won’t be tolerated any more.

What parents can do

If you notice signs that your child might be the victim of bullying, raise your concerns sensitively with them. Most important of all, listen and get all the facts, then work with the school to try and resolve the situation.

If you feel that the school isn’t doing enough, go to the police. Senior Constable Patterson noted that the police usually contact the school as a first step and this may spur the school to take further action.

“Don’t forget that it is a criminal offence to make another person scared for their safety and the police can—and do—get involved. Daily,” Senior Constable Patterson told me. However, he stressed that it is important to have evidence, as one of the most common reasons that a school fails to take legal action is that they don’t have proof of the offence. In the absence of evidence, he recommends that parents encourage their children to ask witnesses of the bullying to write down what they saw.

Court action is not the only police solution. They may first seek another way of resolving the bullying—for instance, a talk with the police is often enough of a warning to a bully that they need to stop.

Ultimately, if you’ve tried everything, you’re not satisfied that your child is safe from bullying and they are still miserable—move schools! Many kids thrive with a fresh start.

Set a good example

All the anti-bullying campaigns in the world won’t make a difference if children are surrounded by examples of adult discrimination and bullying. This means it is important to remember to never make negative comments about other people’s race, gender, sexuality, weight, appearance, name, accent, voice and so on.

Bullies need us, too

I also want to emphasise another reason for putting a stop to bullying: the need to improve outcomes for the bullies themselves. There is ample research to show that bullies are more likely to drop out of school, use drugs and alcohol and engage in criminal behaviour. They have a one in four chance of having a criminal record by the age of 30. Bullies need intervention by schools, parents and the community to help them curb their aggression.

Helpful resources

International Women’s Day – Keeping Feminism Relevant

Last night on ABC’s Q&A Janet Albrechtsen made the following statement on the state of feminism amongst our young women:

A few days ago at a Sydney girls’ high school, the girls were asked whether they were feminists. Of 90 girls, 30 girls put their hands up. Now, I think that’s quite unfortunate. These are girls who are obviously in favour of female suffrage. They’re in favour of equal pay and yet there is something going on here that a lot of young girls are not finding feminism attractive. The debates around quotas and discrimination are all part of a wider debate about feminism and we have to ask what it is that’s turning young girls away…

I’m not sure that I agree with Ms Albrechtsen’s assumption that this generation of girls are fleeing from feminism. Rather, I think they have a healthy interest in women’s issues, even if they do not necessarily relate to the terminology. Monica Dux, author of The Great Feminist Denial, argued in an article I was also interviewed for (“Putting Girls Issues Back On The Radar”) that a feminist consciousness is there but that we have just got to start claiming back the label.

And make no mistake, it is vital that we connect this generation of young women to the feminist agenda as the work is far from done.

Despite making up 45% of our workforce, the number of women on corporate boards is just 8.3% (an issue the Q & A panellists also discussed at length). Violence against women is a huge issue: one in three women has experienced physical violence since the age of 15; nearly one in five women has experienced sexual assault since the age of 15; and almost every week, one woman is killed by her current or former partner. One need only look at popular culture to see that misogyny and sexism are not only alive but indeed well paid (think footballers who choose to behave badly and Charlie Sheen). Meanwhile, for our sisters overseas, every day is an ongoing battle. The following extract from REFUGEES magazine, produced by the Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, is deeply shocking:

There are approximately 50 million uprooted people around the world – refugees who have sought safety in another country and people displaced within their own country. Between 75-80 per cent of them are women and children.

The majority of people flee their homes because of war and the proportion of war victims who are civilians leaped in recent decades from five per cent to over 90 per cent of casualties. Eighty per cent of casualties by small arms are women and children, who far outnumber military casualties.

Females are subjected to widespread sexual abuse. In Bosnia and Rwanda rape became a deliberate aim of war. More than 20,000 Muslim women were raped in Bosnia in a single year, 1992, and a great majority of the female survivors of Rwanda’s 1994 genocide were assaulted.

More than 300,000 youngsters, many of them female refugees, are currently serving as child soldiers around the world. The girls are often forced into different forms of sexual slavery.

More than 16.4 million women today have HIV/AIDS and in the last few years the percentage of women infected has risen from 41 to 47 per cent of the affected population. In sub-Saharan Africa, teenage girls are five times more likely to be infected than boys.

The majority of trafficked people are women, especially those bound for the world’s sex industries. Females are particularly vulnerable to trafficking because many have little individual security, economic opportunity or property or land ownership. Many victims are kidnapped or sold into slavery by their own families.

An estimated 1.3 billion people worldwide, 70 per cent of them women, live in absolute poverty on less than $1 a day.

Me and my PHD student friend and colleague Sarah Casey - rockin' Feminism.
Me and my PhD student friend and colleague Sarah Casey - rockin' Feminism.

The team here at Enlighten Education also investigated some of the reasons why young women are distancing themselves from the “F” word when designing our newest workshop aimed at inspiring girls to be proud Feminists – Real Girl Power. Some girls thought the work was done: “We have a female Prime Minister and a female Governor General.” Others thought that only those with “hairy legs” and those who hated men could join the club. Kate Ellis, our Minister for Employment Participation, Child Care and Status of Women, hinted at the latter misconception too when she revealed on Q & A that when she first entered politics she was advised to cut her hair and wear glasses (despite having perfect vision). Can we be taken seriously as female leaders, and indeed as feminists, if we have long hair, stilettos and wear lippy?

Yes.

We do not owe it to feminism to dress down. Nor, of course, should we feel pressured to dress up. Feminism surely must be about informed choice.

Sarah Casey, a friend and colleague, is currently completing her PhD at Griffith University. Her focus is on the relevance of feminism to the world today. Sarah argues that feminism will be revived for mainstream audiences through action rather than continual academic dialogue, which is often inaccessible to the majority of youth. “I believe that human rights violations against women throughout the world need to be addressed with urgency and focussed feminist organisation that takes into account and critiques youth culture. For example, we must tap into and explore new technologies, celebrity consumer culture and philanthropic capitalism,” writes Sarah.

In our work, we have discovered  that  when we inform girls about some of the struggles women are enduring in the third world, they soon realise that the feminist battles have not all been fought. A Western woman’s experience is vastly different to that of a woman in the developing world.  We remind girls that not only are they privileged to have choices, but that they also have powerful voices they may chose to use to effect global change. Sites like The Girl Effect and Plan International’s Because I Am A Girl are both great starting points and offer not only education but also practical ways in which we can all contribute to making a difference.

We also encourage girls to act on issues that do affect them directly. We distribute “Girl Caught” stickers (you may download a PDF with these stickers here: GirlCaught Stickers(2009)) inspired by the US Mind on The Media campaign that encourages girls to talk back to advertisers who portray women in a negative light. To say girls love these would be an understatement – every time we hand these out at school girls try to sneak extra copies from us!

GirlCaught_Sticker

We are now also distributing The Equality Rights Alliance’s postcards calling on The Hon Peter Garrett (Minister for School Education, Early Childhood and Youth) to put the Voluntary Industry Code of Conduct for Body Image into force. An electronic version of this card may be sent from here.

I’d love to hear how you are connecting the young women at your school to feminism too.

Postscript: Thank you to Rachel Hanson for bringing this excellent TED Talk to my attention. Here young feminist Courtney Martin ( author of the insightful Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters) gives a personal account of how she reinvented feminism and connected with the movement.

Real-World Tech Influencers

Last week an infographic went viral that posed the question “Which Female Tech Influencer Are You?” By answering inane questions such as “Jimmy Choos or running shoes?” and “White wine spritzer or tequila with worm?” you are supposed to find out which successful female tech influencer you most resemble.

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Please. I know this is just meant to be fun but really — isn’t it incredibly patronising to suggest the biggest decision made by dynamos such as Google vice president Marissa Mayer and Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg is which handbag they might like to take to work? Writer and real-world tech influencer Alexia Tsotsis nailed it on the site Tech Crunch:

The women who have been highlighted here are smart, driven, and have worked hard for their success. They deserve so much more than being reduced to an infographic bobble-head on a cartoon body.

When you think of all the legends in the development of information and communications technologies (ICTs), you rarely hear the names of women. The usual names that spring to mind are Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Richard Stallman and, recently, Mark Zuckerberg , for being the genius behind the popular social networking website Facebook. Can you imagine anyone asking these men how they prefer to style their hair?

How can we move beyond limiting stereotypes and sexist sniggering?

By telling HERstory!

HERstory is an initiative of Take Back The Tech, a grassroots campaign that encourages everyone, particularly girls and women, to take control of technology and use it as a tool to do something incredibly vital: put an end to violence against women. The campaign lends itself to some excellent and much-needed school-based work on cyber safety and activism. Their website includes sensible online safety tips, campaign banners and posters, videos, blog posts and an “Idea Kitchen” filled with inspiration.  One of those ideas is to tell HERstory by spotlighting “the innovative girls and women around you who are doing creative, inventive and groundbreaking things with technology”.  I had never heard of the following women who shaped the cyber frontier until I visited the website for Take Back The Tech:

  • Ada Lovelace — the first computer programmer in history, who wrote the first algorithm specifically for the computer
  • Grace Hopper — the inventor of the first computer language composed of words
  • Betty Holberton, Kay McNulty, Marlyn Wescoff, Ruth Lichterman, Betty Jean Jennings and Fran Bilas — the six women who were the original programmers of the first general-purpose computer, ENIAC.

Why does telling HERstory matter? Because when only men get attention for their roles in ICT:

This contributes to the idea that ICTs is the domain of men and boys as creators and innovators, and that women and girls are mainly just users and consumers. This in turn affects the choices that parents make in encouraging their children to study science and technology based on their gender, and the masculine culture that permeates the industry, making it hard for women and girls to enter as equal participants and decision-makers. What happens is a perpetuation of this cycle of gender stereotypes and myths that cast women as passive background actors in the development of ICTs and men as active groundbreakers – the stuff of legends.

— Take Back The Tech

I am always inspired by the women I know who are using technology to make changes. The team over at Collective Shout have initiated a number of successful campaigns lobbying corporations to end their objectification and sexualisation of women. Their recent petition to ban the release of Kanye West’s Monster video now has almost 7,000 signatories.

And I am really excited about the new site launched by the Equality Rights Alliance, Sharing Young Women’s Stories. This site has been set up to celebrate 100 Years of International Women’s Day. It features a number of guest bloggers (including yours truly) and encourages people to upload and share stories of women who inspire. There is also a postcard that can be downloaded and sent to  Minister Garrett, asking him to do more to promote healthy body image. Enlighten Education is going to pay to have 10,000 of these cards printed to distribute to our client schools during our upcoming in-school events. We find girls willingly embrace activism!

So, perhaps a revised infographic suggesting the decisions women really make when using technology to shape their careers, and indeed their culture, might actually pose questions like: “You see an injustice. Do you blog on it or set up an on-line petition?” and ” You like to share the love and encourage the women around you who are making changes. Do you Tweet about their work or set up a Facebook Fan Page?”

No . . . even that would be far too limiting. The smart cyber-amazons I know don’t just chose one path. They do it all.

Postscript:

Other Butterfly Effect posts on girls and technology that may inform and inspire you (particularly when planning International Women’s Day events at your home or school) include:

And my 3-part series on cyber world:

Part 1 — What is working?

Part 2  — Cyber bully busting

Part 3 — Dealing with more difficult truths

Why we do what we do, and how we shall make it even better.

It has long been my goal to help girl move beyond Bratz, Britney and Bacardi Breezers.

Girls are excelling in all kinds of ways – academically, socially and on the sporting field to name a few – but underneath that facade of success, our girls are in trouble. While they may appear to be coping with all that life throws at them, behind closed doors many are silently imploding. Teenage girls exist in a world of peer pressure and unrealistic self-expectations, a world subtly skewed by the insidious marketing hype of popular girl brands such as Bratz, Britney and Bacardi Breezers. And it is poisoning them at a most vulnerable age.

The statistics show there is much to be alarmed by. A quarter of teenage girls surveyed in Australia say they would get plastic surgery if they could. Among 15-year-old girls, almost seven in ten are on a diet, and of these, 8 per cent are severely dieting. Peer pressure is a cause of pain for many, with six in ten girls saying they have been teased about their appearance.

Seven out of ten young women engage in binge drinking – consuming five or more alcoholic drinks on one occasion – and almost one in five do so on a weekly basis. An alarming 12 per cent of girls report drinking harmful levels of alcohol – more than five standard drinks on any one day – and twice the number of teenage girls use drugs, compared with boys.

Pressure at school is also an issue, with nearly two out of three girls questioned in an Australian survey saying they feel stressed about their studies.

As many as one in ten teenage girls self-harm. Male suicide rates remain considerably higher than female suicide rates, but there is evidence to suggest that women, particularly those under twenty-five, attempt suicide and commit self-harm at a higher rate than men. It is estimated that for each female suicide, there are 150 to 300 acts of self-harm performed by females.

It seems that unprotected sex is resulting in unwanted outcomes for some. Sexually transmitted diseases are on the increase among young people. It has been estimated that as many as 28 per cent of teenagers have chlamydia. In Australia, pregnancy termination, or abortion, is the second most common hospital procedure for females aged 12 to 24 years.

All of this troubles me, and my Enlighten team. Deeply. It is our life’s work to help girls navigate the more toxic elements of girl world. To critique. To question. To demand more for themselves and their sisters.

To date Enlighten Education has had much success in this area. We currently work with approximately 20,000 young women right across Australia and New Zealand every year. Our Testimonials indicate the work we are doing significantly changes culture and provides girls with the skills they need to make sense of their increasingly complex world.

Danni…what can I say! I have just read the comments on facebook…

What you achieved with our girls yesterday was remarkable. It is a message that we could not achieve in two years!! I really want to thank you.

Being a new (relatively young) Principal in a girls school, yesterday really gave me a good opportunity to reflect on my own wishes for our students. I love being a Teacher and a Principal and I really love Clonard and each of the students that I have been blessed with in caring for. Watching our students respond to you was an amazing experience.

Clonard is a truly special place. I am very proud of our girls. It was an absolute privilege to sit through all of your sessions finding myself captivated by every moment. What I really couldn’t get over at the end was the line of girls that just wanted to hug you and say thanks. Talk about special!!!

A number of the teachers there yesterday came up to me and said how much they had learnt. It’s true…you can teach a teacher!!!

I feel that your powerful message will stay with these students for their journey through Clonard. I know it will be something that I will refer back to when the going gets tough.

I feel privileged to have met you, listened to you and learnt from you. I do know now what Jemma and Mel (our two Yr 11 girls who attended the Insight Conference) were talking about!!!

Thank you and I hope that we can have you back in 2011.

Damian McKew, Principal, Clonard College, Geelong West, Victoria

Enlighten provided the most successful presentation relating to Pastoral Care in our school in 2010. Dannielle’s understanding of the issues that influence self esteem and behaviour in teenage girls is evident. Even more importantly, many of our girls have commented on the way that Dannielle’s message has begun to influence their everyday attitude towards body image and the objectification of women in the media. St Clare’s will certainly integrate ‘The Butterfly Effect’ into our Pastoral Care program in the future.

Patrick McGing, Assistant Principal, St Clare’s College, Waverley

Just wanted to pass on to your company what a wonderful afternoon our Year 7-9 girls have just experienced. Your presenter Nikki was just terrific and she had the girls eating out of her hands! The content was spot on and the girls certainly left on a real high. It was a pleasure reading the feedback sheets and we look forward to working with your company again.

Kristen Waldron, Hamilton College, Hamilton, Victoria

The girls thoroughly enjoyed the day, and I believe they took a lot away with them. The topics covered on the day were very relevant to the girls and where they are in their lives. Dannielle knew her material and knew how to reach out to the girls in a way that made them want to listen and change and take on board the messages she presented to them. The information night presented to parents was informative and the parents came away enlightened and with positive strategies on how to deal with their teenage girls. Parents were very grateful for the opportunity to listen to Dannielle.

We will definitely invite Enlighten Education to work with our students again and hope we will have the opportunity for Dannielle to present to our parents again in the future.

Kathy Harris, Year 8 Coordinator, Mt Lilydale Mercy College, Lilydale, Victoria

Poster 6 - "You are loved."
Poster 6 - "You are loved."

In 2011 we will be expanding our services to ensure we ensure we offer more support to parents and educators who wish to raise amazing girls. To this end, we have developed a range of affordable resources we hope every girl will be able to access. You may view these, and order, at  the new Shop page of this blog.

I shall be taking a few weeks off over Christmas to enjoy my new home and celebrate Christmas. I’d like, therefore, to take this opportunity to sincerely thank all our blog subscribers, client schools, and the many thousands of young women we have been privileged enough to meet over the course of 2010. We now have over 4,750 young women as “Fans” on Facebook and we love hearing from them all. They truly grace us with the most heart-warming support for our work. Who said the revolution was over? We’re just warming up!

I wish all my readers much Love, Light and Laughter.

And new beginnings in 2011…

Hope and healing: Breaking the silence on sexual abuse

There are a couple of important events coming up next week that I want to let you know about. Forget-me-knot Day is Friday 12th November, in support of survivors of child abuse. And from 12–13 November, some of the world’s leading experts are in Sydney for the ACARP conference on clergy abuse and a sexual assault summit run by Survivors Australia. I will be attending, so please come and say hi. I hope to see many teachers there, as sexual abuse is such an important issue for the girls we work with.

At least 12% of girls are sexually abused before the age of 15, according to the Australian Bureau of Statistics. That’s more than 1 in 10 of the girls in our classrooms. As sexual abuse often goes unreported, the real figure is probably even higher.

In my teaching career, sadly I was told of sexual abuse by four separate girls, and worked with them through the process of reporting it to DOCS and getting counselling for them. It is heartbreaking to see the impact of sexual abuse on girls. And reading the firsthand account of Nicole Wells, founder of Survivors Australia, it’s clear just how urgent it is that we do more to prevent it. She was 8 when she was first abused. Of the long-term effect, she writes:

This wasn’t just the destruction of my childhood . . . I couldn’t finish school. I couldn’t go on to university. I couldn’t keep friends. I couldn’t maintain relationships. I couldn’t keep a job. I couldn’t be happy. I couldn’t control my anger . . .

Comparatively speaking I’m one of the lucky ones. I’m alive. I’m talking about my trauma. I am finding the strength to help myself and help others. Many don’t survive and are consumed by substance and other forms of abuse and/or suicide. Most never reveal what has happened to them.

In the midst of my anger and sadness at the injustice of sexual abuse, I remind myself of girls’ incredible strength and resilience. With professional support and love, long-term emotional wounds can begin to heal. Melinda Hutchings, author and ambassador for Forget-me-knot Day, says:

My message as a survivor is that to overcome the trauma of sexual abuse it is important to be open and honest about it, and not to be afraid to seek professional help. The process of seeking professional help can be painful because it will bring up memories and horrible feelings will rise to the surface – however, the only way out is through, and by acknowledging the pain and finding strategies to deal with it, you really can move forward and create a happy and fulfilling life . . .

For those who love victims of child sexual abuse, listening, understanding and supporting are critical to the healing process.

Melinda’s latest book, Things Will Get Better: Finding your way through teen issues, has a section about coping with sexual abuse, including real stories from teens along with expert advice.

BUSTING MYTHS ABOUT CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE

Stranger danger. We are right to teach our children to be cautious of strangers, but we also need to know that a child is more likely to be sexually abused by someone they know. “Most abuse occurs in the circles we mix within – the perpetrator is almost always someone known to the family,” says Melinda Hutchings. Most abusers are heterosexual males and they come from all socioeconomic backgrounds. Some are female.

It must not have been that bad if it took years for her to speak out about it. A girl may block sexual abuse from her memory or go into denial as a survival mechanism. Most girls are scared to talk, because abusers are often physically or emotionally violent and threaten to harm them or their loved ones. Other reasons a girl may keep abuse to herself is that she didn’t feel she had someone to talk to she could trust, she thought no one would believe her, she thought she’d get taken from home or she blamed herself for the abuse.

Children lie about sexual abuse. It is in fact rare for a child to make up a story about sexual abuse or imagine it.

WHAT CAN WE DO?

Watch for early warning signs. When a child has been sexually abused you are more likely to notice behavioural changes than physical signs.  Here is a list of warning signs to watch for:

  • An increase in aggression
  • Going back to behaviour from an earlier developmental stage, such as bedwetting or thumb sucking
  • Sexual behaviour and play that is too mature for her age
  • Depression or withdrawing from friends and family
  • Getting into trouble at school, especially if it seems in order to avoid going home
  • Self-harm such as cutting or attempting suicide.

If a child’s disposition alters it is worth finding out why . . . By staying in tune with what is going on in your child’s world, you will have every chance of recognising if something doesn’t feel right.—Melinda Hutchings.

Never blame the victim. On this blog I’ve talked about the vitriolic language that is often used to deride a girl or woman who speaks out about sexual assault. The media, and indeed ordinary people, say things like “She was asking for it being dressed that way” or “Well, she went back to the footy player’s room, so what did she expect?” What message does that send to a 12-year-old girl who has to go home every night to an abusive situation? If she hears people making such judgments, how comfortable is she going to be about speaking up?

Be vigilant. We need to be mindful of the people in our children’s lives. Australian organisation Child Wise has some great resources on signs that should ring alarm bells, and how to create and choose organisations and activities that are safe for children.

Instinct is powerful so trust your gut when it comes to the people you invite into your life because they will automatically be in your child’s life as well.—Melinda Hutchings.

Educate. From an early age, every girl needs to be taught that no one has the right to touch her inappropriately or to ask her to touch them. Children also need to be taught that if an adult makes them feel scared or uncomfortable, they need to tell someone immediately.

Child sex offenders generally do not target children who are confident, knowledgeable and assertive when it comes to protecting their bodies.—‘Wise Up’ to Sexual Abuse, Child Wise

Listen. Reassure her that it is not her fault and that you believe her. Stay calm.

RESOURCES

Australia

Kids Helpline (24 hours) 1800 55 1800

Lifeline (24 hours) 131 114

Australian Childhood Foundation

Child Wise

Survivors Australia

ASCA (Adult Survivors of Child Abuse)

New Zealand

The Sexual Abuse Centre 0-3-364 7324

A note about boys: As this blog focuses on girls’ issues, in this post I have referred only to girls — but of course all children, boys and girls, are affected by sexual abuse, and all children need our protection and support.

Beyond Cyber Hysteria — Part 1: What is working?

I have recently begun presenting seminars for parents on how they can best support their children — girls and boys — to manage cyber world. This new seminar is called “The good, the bad and the ugly of cyber world”. (To make a booking for me to present this at your school, please email me: danni@enlighteneducation.com.)

When we hear disturbing news reports about children who have been tormented to the point of desperation by cyber-bullies, or groomed and exploited by online predators, it is tempting to want to simply shut the technology off! Yet whilst it is important to be alert and aware of the dangers, it is also important to take a balanced approach and recognise the huge opportunities that technology has opened up for us all. Over the next few weeks I want to share some of the insights I present in my new seminar and offer parents and schools some ways forward.

1197866_open_door_classics_3Firstly, what is the state of play?

Make no mistake, we are all wired up. Some fascinating cyber facts can help put the scale of change into perspective.

— It has been estimated that there are:

  • 1.73 billion internet users worldwide, with 20,970,490 in Oceania and Australia
  • 234 million websites
  • 126 million blogs
  • 27.3 million tweets posted on Twitter every day
  • 260 billion page views on Facebook per month
  • 1 billion videos viewed on YouTube every day.
  • 90 trillion emails were sent in 2009 (81% were spam).

— What are teens doing online?

  • 14% blog
  • 8% use Twitter
  • 8% visit virtual worlds
  • 38% share content
  • 62% get news
  • 48% buy things
  • 31% get health, dieting and fitness information
  • 17% get information about sensitive topics.
  • 41% of the Australian population has a social network profile, and 70% of them have 2 or more.
  • And about a third of high school students interviewed said they learned about sex predominantly through viewing pornography on the internet. (More on the implications of this for the development of healthy sexuality and positive relationships in another post!)

As I’ve argued in a previous post and in my book The Butterfly Effect, in our rapidly changing world, connection is vital. All young people need to not only be able to read and write in print media, but to be multi-literate — that is, to be competent in the manipulation of a range of media. There is considerable evidence that whilst girls are more successful at reading and writing than boys, more girls than boys are in trouble in relation to ICT literacy. NSW Department of Education and Training research tells us that:

girls (in Australia) were more inclined than boys to see IT as boring (36% compared to 16%) or difficult (23% to 11%). These factors result in more boys than girls studying technology related subjects. Analysis of NSW High School Certificate (HSC) 2002 computer programming student population revealed that only 17% of the total entrants were female. The trend is also demonstrated in the TAFE sector with women comprising approximately 40% of all Information Technology enrolments for 2001. This indicates a decrease in enrolment share from 1996 when women accounted for 50% of IT enrolments.

This trend is evident right across Australia and in New Zealand. If it continues, young women are at risk of becoming part of the information-poor and of being excluded from the new and emerging jobs of the future. Let’s not allow fear to drive us to further isolate and limit our girls. Rather, let’s inspire girls to get savvy and to use ICT as a tool to meet their own needs.

On the positive side, technology has the capacity to allow for:

Connecting. Whilst we often hear negative reports about teen girls behaving badly on Facebook, Enlighten Education’s Facebook page has become a testimony to the capacity young women have to be thankful and engage in meaningful dialogue about issues that matter to them. We have had almost 3,000 teen girls join since we launched it earlier this year and we have had only one negative comment posted on the wall to date. Girls post images that inspire them, point out ads they find sexist or limiting and offer their thoughtful opinions on topics we pose for discussion.

find_us_on_facebook_badge

Informing. There are some fabulous sites out there for young people. Some of my personal favourites include: www.myfuture.edu.au (career information), www.reachout.com.au (youth-friendly information on topics such as depression and eating disorders), www.whatareyoudoingtoyourself.com (aimed at curbing teen binge drinking), www.mypopstudio.com (a creative play experience that builds media literacy skills), www.newmoon.com (a safe online community especially designed for young girls), www.latrobe.edu.au/psy/projects/bodylife/ (a free online program to assist girls with body image dissatisfaction), www.operationbeautiful.com (a grassroots movement aimed at ending negative self talk).

Creating. Many girls are creating their own blogs and websites to promote causes that matter to them. I love teen girl Parrys Raines’ site, www.climategirl.com.au, where she discusses all things planet-loving. My own teen, Jazmine, posts her amazing photography on Tumblr so she can share and get feedback from other budding photographers.

Educating. Many schools are doing incredibly innovative things with technology and have moved way beyond encouraging students to make their own PowerPoint presentations. Greg Whitby, Executive Director of Schools, Diocese of Parramatta, is widely considered to be at the forefront in encouraging teachers to use ICTs (information communication technologies) as enablers to facilitate deep learning. He shares some of his favourite sites that promote true collaborative learning at his very good blog: www.gbwhitby.parra.catholic.edu.au.

So, Step 1: Join in! Get to know the online world your daughter or students inhabit.

Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.

—Mark Twain.

Familiarity with the online world will become increasingly important as you learn some of the strategies that will help you protect children and ensure they are safe online — more on that next week.

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